According to critic Northrop Frye, “Tragic heroes are so much
the highest points in their
human landscape that they seem the inevitable conductors of the power about them, great
trees more likely to be struck by lightning than a clump of grass. Conductors may of course be
instruments as well as victims of the divisive lightning.” Select a novel or play in which a tragic
figure functions as an instrument of the suffering of others. Then write an essay in which you
explain how the suffering brought upon others by that figure contributes to the tragic vision of
the work as a whole.
human landscape that they seem the inevitable conductors of the power about them, great
trees more likely to be struck by lightning than a clump of grass. Conductors may of course be
instruments as well as victims of the divisive lightning.” Select a novel or play in which a tragic
figure functions as an instrument of the suffering of others. Then write an essay in which you
explain how the suffering brought upon others by that figure contributes to the tragic vision of
the work as a whole.
Student LLLL:
I am pretty impressed with this essay. I think it does a nice job of incorporating ways that the author uses DIDLS to create effects and meanings. For example, the student describes the imagery of Gatsby reaching across the lake, and how it makes him seem pathetic, which contributes to the idea that he is tortured and is a tragic hero. I also think that this essay does a nice job including quotes and paraphrases from the book, which can be difficult considering the essay is all based off of the student's memory of the work. If I were to give this student one piece of advice, it would be to put the paragraph about how Gatsby's tragedies bring the other characters down directly after the first paragraph, because that is addressing the heart of the thesis.The thesis says to talk about how the tragic hero's suffering affects others,and how that relates to the tragic vision as a whole. This author sort of starts by describing one aspect of the tragic vision, which is how tortured Gatsby is,and then describes how Gatsby acts as an instrument of suffering, and then talks about another aspect of the tragic vision as a whole,which is the fall of the roaring twenties. This makes it a little confusing, but overall I don't think it detracts majorly from the essay. The fact that I can get this nit-picky means the essay is very well written and deserves the score of a 9 that it received.
Student C:
I think that this essay was rated a little too high (it received a 7). The entire second paragraph is basically a far-too-in-depth summary of the plot. Although it does incorporate aspects of the thesis such as duty and vanity, it seems to get distracted from the main point of the prompt which is the tragedy of the hero and how he/she contributes to the suffering of others. I also found some of the more technical issues to be very distracting. For example, the student switches from present tense to past tense while summarizing the plot. The tense should be kept constant and should always be present when discussing literature.I also found the Hamlet reference to be quite random and to have no contribution to the main point of the essay. Overall, although the student seems to show a clear understanding of the prompt, he/she gets too caught up in plot summary and has glaring technical errors that distract the reader from the point the essay is trying to argue. I probably would have rated it a 6.
Student FF:
I feel like I basically just read the entire novel, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest after reading this essay. It is much more a summary of the plot than an analysis of the tragic hero and his affect on other characters. The student mentions the tragedy of the characters and the book at the end of the essay almost as an after thought. Also, like the scoring commentary says, I think that McMurphy has a positive impact on most of the other characters, especially Chief Bromden. He empowers the other characters to stand up for themselves and act out against the harsh conditions of the mental hospital. The book ends with Chief Bromden breaking out of the mental hospital and becoming free, which I think is very optimistic. Before McMurphy comes, Bromden never even talks, and everyone assumes he is deaf. I think that McMurphy's presence has instigated major changes that will improve the lives of the other patients. Overall, I do not think there is enough evidence to support the author's claim, and there is way too much evidence refuting it. That along with the poor organization and distraction from the thesis I think make this essay deserve the 5 it received.
Student C:
I think that this essay was rated a little too high (it received a 7). The entire second paragraph is basically a far-too-in-depth summary of the plot. Although it does incorporate aspects of the thesis such as duty and vanity, it seems to get distracted from the main point of the prompt which is the tragedy of the hero and how he/she contributes to the suffering of others. I also found some of the more technical issues to be very distracting. For example, the student switches from present tense to past tense while summarizing the plot. The tense should be kept constant and should always be present when discussing literature.I also found the Hamlet reference to be quite random and to have no contribution to the main point of the essay. Overall, although the student seems to show a clear understanding of the prompt, he/she gets too caught up in plot summary and has glaring technical errors that distract the reader from the point the essay is trying to argue. I probably would have rated it a 6.
Student FF:
I feel like I basically just read the entire novel, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest after reading this essay. It is much more a summary of the plot than an analysis of the tragic hero and his affect on other characters. The student mentions the tragedy of the characters and the book at the end of the essay almost as an after thought. Also, like the scoring commentary says, I think that McMurphy has a positive impact on most of the other characters, especially Chief Bromden. He empowers the other characters to stand up for themselves and act out against the harsh conditions of the mental hospital. The book ends with Chief Bromden breaking out of the mental hospital and becoming free, which I think is very optimistic. Before McMurphy comes, Bromden never even talks, and everyone assumes he is deaf. I think that McMurphy's presence has instigated major changes that will improve the lives of the other patients. Overall, I do not think there is enough evidence to support the author's claim, and there is way too much evidence refuting it. That along with the poor organization and distraction from the thesis I think make this essay deserve the 5 it received.
Sydney,
ReplyDeleteStudent LLLL:
I read the same essays and I mostly agree with your response. You explain your thoughts well and give specific areas you felt added to the whole essay.
But, I think that the student structured the essay the way he/she did so he/she could lead up to his/her explanation. The student wanted to prove that Gatsby is a tragic hero before going into his/her explanation of how he makes others suffer. The roaring 20s aspect furthers his/her argument and brings it all together. That is how I felt personally at least in why he/she did what he/she did with the structure.
Student C:
I also noticed the constant summarizing. Your explanation of what they could improve on is detailed and helpful. Your focus seems to be that there are many distractions from the main point of the essay and I agree completely.
Student FF:
This is generally what I said too. Because the argument ignores a large part of the novel, its argument is flawed and fails to address complexities of the novel. You explained the issues with the essay well. Great job!
Obviously, since the first essay received a 9 it was pretty well written. I think incorporating DIDLS into the essay is important to help prove the thesis and keep the writer on track, and it seems like that’s what helped this student. Sure, even if an essay received a 9, there’s always room for improvement, but I don’t think that the graders are looking for an immaculate essay. They understand that the students are being put under the pressure of the clock and can only write so much. It still has to be an impressive essay to receive a 9, but I think the graders give some leeway. As for the other two essays, you point out that they had the similar problems of giving too much summary, just to different degrees. I think it’s really easy to accidently give too much summary, so it’s something that we all have to watch out for when writing the essays for the exam, as well as for practice.
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